What to Expect Within The First Year

What to Expect Within the First Year

The period after the funeral is truly when dealing with the real work of grief and mourning begins. This can be the most vulnerable period for a person dealing with loss, particularly in the first year. Everything will seem foreign and around every corner will be a new first without that person in your life. There is nothing that can prepare you to lose a loved one, but no matter how many of us go through it, we have not yet found a way to make the process easier. In the first year, you can expect to feel a whirlwind of emotions. While some may be positive, we suggest understanding the bad and preparing for it. Below is a list of emotions that can make the first year after the death of your loved one truly difficult. Once you understand these, you can know where to turn with our helpful resources.

Shock

After the death and loss of a loved one, you may initially feel numb. This is your mind’s natural way of protecting you from dealing with the pain. Because your mind is trying to process such a huge shock, memory functions can be affected, putting you in a “haze.” Like feeling. You may at times question your sanity, though you know you are not crazy. 

Denial

You can also expect to go through a period of denial. Your loved one can’t actually be gone! It feels like yesterday you could hear their voice on the phone and it feels like minutes ago you saw them walk through your doorway. 

Guilt

After the death of a loved one, it’s common for your brain to race back and forth between “what if’s” as you play out scenarios in which their life could have been saved.Your pain is affecting your emotional and psychological systems at an extremely high level. It's common to feel like you're on overload.

Anger

Anger and frustration are feelings frequently reported by those experiencing the pain and grief of losing a loved one. Especially if the death was accidental, these emotions may be more intense. You may also be angry that life seems like it goes on for other people - as if nothing has even happened!

Hopelessness

After the death and loss of a loved one, you are grieving not only for them but also for the life they would have lived. Time will not always provide you with relief from this aspect of grief. You may even experience an overwhelming sense of grief at the time they would have been expected to start school, graduate, get married, retire, etc. Of all things, it is most important to allow yourself to grieve. This is a normal and necessary part of the healing process.

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